Dealing with Imposter Syndrome

midlevelman

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So far I’ve read day 1 & 2 of the digital strategy course and a lot of old feelings of imposter syndrome and negative self talk have begun to arise.

Anyone have any guidance on how they pushed past this? For me it’s never gone away, I’ve just learnt and grown.

Maybe there something I’m missing in the success formula written about in day 1.
 
You should look at Day 14 - Mental Strength

In that thread @built asks later on about not having his ideas be good enough, it similar to imposter syndrome. Negative self-talk is rooted in Imprinting

@Ryuzaki has a great thread about this: Psychological Barriers to Success

That whole thread has all the answers you could be looking for - especially for questions you haven't begun to ask of yourself.

Edit: What's a bit ironical in all the problems that we face, fear, self-doubt, imposter syndrome - they all lead to the same final answer: ACTION.

"Just fucking do it" - Dan Peña​

You can get over ANYTHING simply by taking action, action, and more action. That's it.
 
I think a lot of this comes from being a child and looking at teenagers, or being a teenager and looking at adults, etc., and seeing this wide chasm between you and them. It feels like an infinite amount of time, intelligence, and experience. Then you end up finding yourself as a teenager or adult and still feeling inferior.

The way society worships people who excel in their fields (or are chosen to excel...) like sports stars, movie stars, and even crap like Instagram people and Twitch streamers. The popularity contests never end for most people on this earth and that's exploited endlessly.

I agree with @CCarter. The solution is action and eventual success.

When I first started what I was doing, people told me it was a waste of time or impossible. My own brother told me it would be impossible to make 7-figures on a website.

When I went full time, my old co-workers accused me of sitting around at home not doing anything, as if money was magically coming in. My own girlfriend I lived with pulled this stunt and created so much resentment in her own head about it that it contributed to our breakup.

Once I started making good money, people, including my own parents, would insinuate I do stuff like spamming emails to sell pills, hacking routers and other hacker stuff, and anything they could think of to undermine the success.

And then finally, when I kept going and nothing changed, they started asking me for help. Some would nag me for years to let them become a partner in my business until I stopped talking to them. Others have asked me once a week for years about their new business idea and they've literally never taken a first step.

That's when you'll know you're not an imposter. When the very same haters start to look up to you, you've made it. But if you keep comparing yourself to people further along the entrepreneur road, you may continue to feel unworthy. You have to control your own mind (Day 1 in the Crash Course), but imposter syndrome is alleviated by winning.
 
@midlevelman Not everything takes a ton of preparation and it doesn’t always have to be perfect. And if you do decide to take action, it doesn’t come down to “just being lucky” when something pans out.

And like J.B.P mentioned; “Compare yourself to who you where yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” And that also implies thay when you fail today, you’ll get back on your feet tomorrow and kick life in the balls and give it a go with a twist.

And if you happen to hit that Guru mofo at the same time, just remember that it was you, and you alone who made it happen. Not some cosmic karma shitfaced twat that floats somewhere in outer space. That one you’ll meet when your time here is over.

Just make sure that you can look him in the eyes and tell him that you gave it everything you had, and you now deserved the right to that spot next to him. You’ll need it to be able to have a good look down at what you left behind for the ones that really matter to you.
 
CCarter said:
You should look at Day 14 - Mental Strength

In that thread @built asks later on about not having his ideas be good enough, it similar to imposter syndrome. Negative self-talk is rooted in Imprinting

@Ryuzaki has a great thread about this: Psychological Barriers to Success

That whole thread has all the answers you could be looking for - especially for questions you haven't begun to ask of yourself.

Edit: What's a bit ironical in all the problems that we face, fear, self-doubt, imposter syndrome - they all lead to the same final answer: ACTION.

"Just fucking do it" - Dan Peña​

You can get over ANYTHING simply by taking action, action, and more action. That's it.
Click to expand...
I agree totally, thanks for the links I’ll check them out.

I’m looking forward to the mental toughness day but I’ll do the course in the order it has been presented just I know I’ll follow through, action by action.

Ryuzaki said:
I think a lot of this comes from being a child and looking at teenagers, or being a teenager and looking at adults, etc., and seeing this wide chasm between you and them. It feels like an infinite amount of time, intelligence, and experience. Then you end up finding yourself as a teenager or adult and still feeling inferior.

The way society worships people who excel in their fields (or are chosen to excel...) like sports stars, movie stars, and even crap like Instagram people and Twitch streamers. The popularity contests never end for most people on this earth and that's exploited endlessly.

I agree with @CCarter. The solution is action and eventual success.

When I first started what I was doing, people told me it was a waste of time or impossible. My own brother told me it would be impossible to make 7-figures on a website.

When I went full time, my old co-workers accused me of sitting around at home not doing anything, as if money was magically coming in. My own girlfriend I lived with pulled this stunt and created so much resentment in her own head about it that it contributed to our breakup.

Once I started making good money, people, including my own parents, would insinuate I do stuff like spamming emails to sell pills, hacking routers and other hacker stuff, and anything they could think of to undermine the success.

And then finally, when I kept going and nothing changed, they started asking me for help. Some would nag me for years to let them become a partner in my business until I stopped talking to them. Others have asked me once a week for years about their new business idea and they've literally never taken a first step.

That's when you'll know you're not an imposter. When the very same haters start to look up to you, you've made it. But if you keep comparing yourself to people further along the entrepreneur road, you may continue to feel unworthy. You have to control your own mind (Day 1 in the Crash Course), but imposter syndrome is alleviated by winning.
Click to expand...
I love that and that’s exactly what I want to be able to do.

I tend to associate and hang with the top level people in any company I work for so that’s where Iguess my imposter syndrome started. All of these guys are mega successful (not online), so it’s hard not to compare yourself if all the people you strive to associate with have millions in the bank and you only have thousands.

this is definitely something that I’m starting to see through though with the help of this community.

you guys are great at helping people see through the bullshit. Thank you.

DanSkippy said:
@midlevelman Not everything takes a ton of preparation and it doesn’t always have to be perfect. And if you do decide to take action, it doesn’t come down to “just being lucky” when something pans out.

And like J.B.P mentioned; “Compare yourself to who you where yesterday, not to who someone else is today.” And that also implies thay when you fail today, you’ll get back on your feet tomorrow and kick life in the balls and give it a go with a twist.

And if you happen to hit that Guru mofo at the same time, just remember that it was you, and you alone who made it happen. Not some cosmic karma shitfaced twat that floats somewhere in outer space. That one you’ll meet when your time here is over.

Just make sure that you can look him in the eyes and tell him that you gave it everything you had, and you now deserved the right to that spot next to him. You’ll need it to be able to have a good look down at what you left behind for the ones that really matter to you.
Click to expand...
I definitely need to get better at comparing myself to who I was yesterday. I’m definitely an A type personality so I tend to push myself a little harder than most, so what’s a “mistake” to others is me kicking myself in the ass. Definitely not healthy sometimes and for sure something I need to work on, but in saying that the current business I’m working in I achieved what takes most people 2.5 years in 6 months (bottom of the heap to senior management) so it definitely helps as well.
 
I dont have a link right now but it's in my garden post somewhere.

Check out how far I fell off (for applaudable reasons), when i first came back to BUSO. I posted step by step my growth from living in a car to now i'm already back in the Caribbean just over a year later.

If you did it once, you can do it again. Success isn't luck and 'its in you, not on you" when it comes to success. Remember that line.
 
Last edited:
Dealing with imposter syndrome? I have an easy fix.

Go get hired at a digital advertising agency. You'd be surprised at how little those guys know.
And how much they charge!

The experience will be eye-opening for you, it really will be. And if you're driven (which it seems you are), it'll be inspiring for you, too, to realize how these people who know next to nothing are making so much money in marketing. If you know your stuff, there is a world of opportunity.
 
Tiberian said:
Dealing with imposter syndrome? I have an easy fix.

Go get hired at a digital advertising agency. You'd be surprised at how little those guys know.
And how much they charge!

The experience will be eye-opening for you, it really will be. And if you're driven (which it seems you are), it'll be inspiring for you, too, to realize how these people who know next to nothing are making so much money in marketing. If you know your stuff, there is a world of opportunity.
Click to expand...

I get what you're saying but your example is more about how people who fit in can have it a lot easier. They don't know much (or that's what you perceived based upon your values), probably don't work hard, and get big contracts.

Hmmm... who would know more? The people who are in the C-suite at that company or the new hire who decided to quit after a year or two to work on his own projects? Who has imposter syndrome and who knows the social aspects of the business?

I would give the heads of that digital agency more credit than you are.
 
Tiberian said:
Dealing with imposter syndrome? I have an easy fix.

Go get hired at a digital advertising agency. You'd be surprised at how little those guys know.
And how much they charge!

The experience will be eye-opening for you, it really will be. And if you're driven (which it seems you are), it'll be inspiring for you, too, to realize how these people who know next to nothing are making so much money in marketing. If you know your stuff, there is a world of opportunity.
Click to expand...
Philip J. Fry said:
I get what you're saying but your example is more about how people who fit in can have it a lot easier. They don't know much (or that's what you perceived based upon your values), probably don't work hard, and get big contracts.

Hmmm... who would know more? The people who are in the C-suite at that company or the new hire who decided to quit after a year or two to work on his own projects? Who has imposter syndrome and who knows the social aspects of the business?

I would give the heads of that digital agency more credit than you are.
Click to expand...

To be fair, @Tiberian isn't talking about the C-level I feel.

As someone that has worked at multiple agencies over 20+ years ( both in-house full-time and remote contract ) I've experienced a lot of the agency life on many levels.

80% of the time, what @Tiberian stated is true all through the agency, even at the owners.

Most of that 80%, that @Tiberian stated is experienced at the co-worker level ( below the owners ), but I've worked a ton one on one with owners that are the same.

The owners might be great at closing contracts and winning sales, but I feel what @Tiberian is talking about is more about the marketing work itself than selling contracts/managing a business as an agency owner or C-level exec.
 
EyesExist said:
I dont have a link right now but it's in my garden post somewhere.

Check out how far I fell off (for applaudable reasons), when i first came back to BUSO. I posted step by step my growth from living in a car to now i'm already back in the Caribbean just over a year later.

If you did it once, you can do it again. Success isn't luck and 'its in you, not on you" when it comes to success. Remember that line.
Click to expand...
How would I go about finding this post? I'd love to read about your journey.
 
eliquid said:
To be fair, @Tiberian isn't talking about the C-level I feel.

As someone that has worked at multiple agencies over 20+ years ( both in-house full-time and remote contract ) I've experienced a lot of the agency life on many levels.

80% of the time, what @Tiberian stated is true all through the agency, even at the owners.

Most of that 80%, that @Tiberian stated is experienced at the co-worker level ( below the owners ), but I've worked a ton one on one with owners that are the same.

The owners might be great at closing contracts and winning sales, but I feel what @Tiberian is talking about is more about the marketing work itself than selling contracts/managing a business as an agency owner or C-level exec.
Click to expand...

Yeah, we're talking about the same thing.

Tiberian is valuing the hard skills of marketing. I'm arguing that soft skills are vital for fitting in, sales, and promotions.

Leaving a company to make it on your own doesn't mean that you'll develop the soft skills that's needed to fit in. If OP doesn't feel like he fits in on an online forum, he'll have a hard time fitting in at an agency, with employees, at sales meetings, at client meetings, and so forth. If he goes on his own, he'll be stuck at the only place where he'll fit in: by himself. He has to learn soft skills.
 
Philip J. Fry said:
Yeah, we're talking about the same thing.

Tiberian is valuing the hard skills of marketing. I'm arguing that soft skills are vital for fitting in, sales, and promotions.

Leaving a company to make it on your own doesn't mean that you'll develop the soft skills that's needed to fit in. If OP doesn't feel like he fits in on an online forum, he'll have a hard time fitting in at an agency, with employees, at sales meetings, at client meetings, and so forth. If he goes on his own, he'll be stuck at the only place where he'll fit in: by himself. He has to learn soft skills.
Click to expand...
This is deep and I like it.

I have dealt with sales reps, management meetings, company directors directly for the past 8 or so years of my life and have worked under them and grown their businesses successfully over that period.

for me this isn’t about working on my own, however I enjoy that as it provides me a lot more focus.
 
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